So I didn't gain... But I didn't lose either.
I somehow knew it would be this way...
I fucking maintained!
I semi don't believe the scale...
Because:
A) I, once again, have not pooped in 2 days
B) Pretty much everything I ate yesterday was high in sodium, so I'm most likely retaining water
So, I'm going to buy a new scale today! One that I can keep in my room [we have hardwood floors in our room, so the scale would still work there]
That way, I'm not going into my mother's bathroom every time I need to weigh, and she won't know that I'm weighing. Because every time I weigh, I have to go into her bathroom, and she watches me come out with this look on her face that's like "Good news? Bad news? TellMeTellMeTellMe!!"
I don't like talking about my weight out loud... Even to someone as supportive as mi madre [She knows about my tendencies and my thought processes and she still congratulates me when I tell her that I haven't eaten anything, because she knows that, to me, that is a GOOD thing] So yeah, she is extremely supportive.
And if I'm losing consistently, I'm fine with telling her, because I'm excited and I want to tell someone... Not boyfriend, because I don't want to vocalize to him anything about my weight. He's still under the delusion that I'm fine as I am, so I'mma leave him there... Let him think I'm pretty so that he'll stay around while I actually become pretty. But if I'm not losing consistently, like if I've maintained or gained, she gets this pitiful "I feel SO sorry for you" look that I can't stand seeing.
Not only the bathroom thing, but another reason I want a new scale is because the one I've been using all this time is ancient. We've had it since I was like 12... So the calibration on that one might not be 100% anyway.
Yesterday, I got nauseous before I could make any real progress at the gym, so my output ended up at 320... Which would be okay, if my intake hadn't been 1460...
I like my outputs to take me out of the 1000s. That's the only way I stay sane with going over 1000 in the first place, because, normally, I know that my output will give me a net that's below it.
Today, I haven't been to the gym... I think I'm going to take 1 day off per week, for muscle recovery and such.
But because I'm not going to the gym today, I'm going to try to stick to liquids only for as long as I can. I won't let my intake cross 1000 today.
So far I've had coffee with cream, and the cream was 80 cals.
That is all I've had other than water, and I'm still feeling pretty good. I figure as long as I consistently keep my stomach full of water, I'll be too full already to think about eating anything... The only problem is forcing the water down. That's why I've failed at water fasts in the past. Because I cease to be thirsty and stop drinking. Then my stomach empties out a bit and I'm suddenly starving. The longest I've ever made it on just water/coffee/tea was 24 hours. The other fasts I've done, like the one's I've participated in through blogger, were liquid fasts, so I could have liquid calories, just not solid ones, and the longest I've lasted on one of those was 48 hours.
I'll probably post again a bit later, if not though, I'll try to post tomorrow after work.
Gotta go, though, me, momma and boyfriend are going shopping =]
XOXO
I suck at water fasts too. I just don't drink enough. So I'm probably over generous with flavorings. Mio and Kroger's version of Mio (kroger's version is both cheaper and has tiny bit of a few b vitamins) and Propel Zero flavor packets (love those!) I still suck at water fasts but the flavorings let me get more water in me so at least I still eat a bit less.
ReplyDeleteHey! Going a little over 1000 cals on one day is no big deal so try not to worry too much :)
ReplyDeleteIt probably is that the scale is broken, working out and controlling your cals the way you have been will definitely lead to weight loss. Time for a new scale!
One rest day a week is a good idea too, I'm pretty sure it's recommended.
Good luck on the liquids. I think the reason liquid fasts work is not because you are only taking in liquids but because you take in less calories than if you were eating solids (usually. That's why I do it anyway, like if I'm only allowed liquids then all those tempting foods aren't an option. Take care :)
Alice xx
Maintenance happens :/ Keep drinking plenty of water and that should flush out the excess salt and help get things . . . . moving along the gut.
ReplyDelete*Hugs* I hate having to can a workout because I'm feeling sick. Are you feeling better today? I hope it was just fatigue and not a bug.
Rest days are as important as training days. It gives your body a chance to recover and shore up the good work you put into making your muscles stronger.
I used to have one day of liquid fasting once a week and always had to break the fast at dinner time when my partner got home :/ If I go any longer than a day I start having chew&spit binges, so one day seems to be the most I can do too :(
I hope you have a good Monday <3
Ah, scales are a bitch! Maybe a good idea to get a different on, though. They're bound to get screwy after awhile. I've had mine since the beginning of my ED, 9 years ago...I THINK it's still working. Haha!
ReplyDeleteI can't do water fasts, either. They make me feel nutty.
Nothing make me more upset then working my ass off all week and not losing any weight, or gaining!!! Ugh! I feel you pain.
ReplyDeleteKeep it up and eventually the scale will move in the right direction.
~MLM